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TRUMP DECLASSIFIES JADE HELM, REALIZES HE OWNS TEXAS

Updated: Apr 14, 2019


Washington D.C. -


Pentagon officials briefed the president today on a top secret mission exposed during the Obama years where Texas was taken over by the federal government. President Trump exercised his power to declassify this information, and made public for the first time that he, in fact, now owned Texas. “This definitely raises my assets” Trump joked at a golf course. “I’m almost back to par.”


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