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Employee Awarded Best Excuses for Being Late Medal

Updated: Feb 4, 2020

New York - 

New employee Jeremy Jackson received the highest award a civilian can be bestowed, the Medal of Honorary Excuses after giving his supervisor over fifty excellent reasons why he has been late to work over the last two years.  “Traffic was horrible today!” and “I had a flat tire” were his first two great excuses but the hits kept coming with “my wife needed a ride to work”, “I stopped to help an old woman change her tire”, and “the water pipes in my house busted and I had to stay home the first half of the day to coordinate with the plumber.”  

Jeremy covered the gambit from funerals to stomach bugs to the flu, never using the same excuse twice.  David Walls, Jeremy’s supervisor, marveled at his ability to regale him with complex, detailed stories of why he was late to work, completely forgetting there was work to be done.  “When someone has a sick kid, you just have to realize we’re all human and family comes first!  The mission is secondary to that.”


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